DODGY DEALINGS WITH A CAR DEALER IN SPAIN

I have a tell to tale. Of car troubles. In Spain, of course. Where to go out the front door seems to cost me money. Or aggro.

I sold a car to a garage in Motril. He got a bargain. I provided all the required documentation. I took the payment in cash.

For reasons i queried at the time, the garage owner asked for a copy of my insurance documents. I provided them. I told him I would be cancelling the policy. He asked me to wait 10 days until the transfer of ownership of the vehicle had gone through at Traffico.

The words of a senior Spanish friend rang in my head: "Watch out in Spain. The country is full of liars, cheats and thieves. The first thought an Andalucian has each morning is 'how can i cheat someone today.'"

Cycnical, yes. But then after 70 odd years on this earth, my friend Luis is entitled to an opinion on his fellow Spanish businessman. And, I am sad to report, Luis has been right so many times in the past six years when warning me about how some of his countrymen behave.

Yes, I should have called the insurance company, Linea Directa, the moment the buyer of the car drove off in it. But I didn't.

Within one hour of him driving the car away, the garage owner saw his mechanic 'accidentally' drive my former car into one of the cars on the forecourt of the garage. He, the garage owner, immediately made a claim using his own insurance company against me and my insurance policy. Which was, of course, still active.

I doubt fraudelent insurance claims come more obvious than this one. And yet Linea Directa are paying out. For a car I had sold to him 60 minutes earlier. For an 'accident' that took place 30 kilometres away from where I was at the time. An event I was not involved in.

I lose 10% no claims when I come to insure again.

Predictably, the buyer has not yet transferred the car to himself via Traffico. It will be three weeks this Friday since I sold the car to him.

So, as I write, I still own the car. If he gets pinched for speeding, or worse, I am responsible for the fine.

As with all transactions in Spain, this one will drag on and on. I dealt with a crook. A spiv. A Real Madrid tracksuit wearing Del Boy. Andalucia is full of them.

I fear what will come next. He's got his insurance payout. What's his next trick to be played against this gullible guiri?

That thought occupies the moments when I should be catching up on my beauty sleep.

As I have said for some time now, it's just as well I don't get out much!